Call Out Your Cat Callers!

Being a woman in the summer when short shorts or whatever clothing suits ninety degree weather is not fun. You think you’ll be catcalled at, which you will, but it will happen in any weather. You could be wearing a sleeping bag and you’ll probably still be harassed. Catcalling is a form of control and not a compliment to women. It’s a power trip for the men that do this and I thank the men that don’t. A while ago, I made a promise to try to stop this while it’s happening no matter how aggravating it was because ignoring a cat call allows men to think it’s okay, that it doesn’t bother us, and, the worst part, that we enjoy it. That’s what I want to change and New York City is going to be a hell of a lot nastier with this new mission. 

Today was a perfect example. The only reason the following encounter lasted so long is because we were walking in the same direction. Maybe I should have walked the other way, but I’m trying to be a badass here and stand up for what I think is right, and that’s not how a badass would react. 

Cat Caller: “Well, don’t you look gorgeous.”

Me: “What? Don’t tell me that. I really don’t want to hear that.”

"Why?"

"It ruins my day."

"It’s just a compliment. You don’t want to hear a compliment?"

"No."

"Well, that makes you conceited…. and ugly."

"Ugly and conceited don’t really go together. And maybe I don’t care what you think.”

"But you’re pretty."

"Trust me. No woman wants to ever hear this kind of stuff. Just don’t say it."

"Ah I think all women do."

"Well, you’re not a woman so I don’t think you’d really know, would you?"

At this point he either needed to cross the street, or better, got sick of my argument and decided to walk the other way. This has been one of the better outcomes of calling out a cat caller. He was an older man and I’m sure he had no idea how he makes women feel, but that’s why something should be said. Maybe he thinks I’m a bitch, but I choose bitch over submissive. Maybe he’ll think about it next time he wants to tell a woman she has nice legs. Maybe he won’t. I’d rather go out of my way to do things like this than let him walk off thinking he made my day better when he really just made me feel uncomfortable. I’d much rather be ugly, conceited, and a bitch. 

Anonymous asked:

I've read your facebook. You puked in your brother. What is the procedure for getting puke out of a sibling? Bleach? Throw him in a washing machine?

Fuck those pants! I gave my brother the best gift a sister can give a brother. The ultimate shitty story to embarrass me with for the rest of my days. He’ll tell everyone forever that I threw up on him at my graduation. It really is the gift that keeps on giving. He’ll bring it up at my brother’s wedding this summer, future thanksgivings and Christmases and if he outlives me, he’ll narrate that story at my funeral. He better not fucking outlive me. I’m sure he’d have a grand time carving it on my grave. “Here Lies Ariel Barnes. Daughter, Sister, Friend, and Remember That One Time She Threw Up On Her Brother?”

Anonymous asked:

Dear Mediocre Advice, My boyfriend and I love to send each other nudes since he lives a bazillion miles away and although it's been hot, I think they're getting boring. How do you keep nudes fresh?

Dear Friend,

THE NOODS/SEXTING GUIDE YOU NEED IN YOUR LIFE:

1. Use Snapchat. No one wants to see their private parts on some revenge porn site. Even I have a few dick pics saved on my phone for leverage. You all know who you are.

2. Boobs are forever. Us girls may think the opposite after the twentieth boob pic since they’re permanently strapped to our chests, but boobs will never go out of style. Boobs for the billionth time = boobs for the first time. Why do you think cleavage is still a thing? It’s only the butt crack of boobs, but you still stare at it like it’s a pot of gold. Girls do it just as much as guys, but the only difference is we don’t go from 6 to midnight and howl like a cartoon dog. 

3. Dick Pics are Not Forever. A dick pic every once in a while is appreciated, but it just looks like a sausage to me. I’ve seen it once, so I’ve seen it a billion times. Looking at it just pisses me off because I’d rather do other things than have a staring contest with a pic of your junk. Send some full body or ab pics, but not just a pic of your one-eyed monster. . 

4. Timing is Everything.  Waking up to a nude is like Christmas morning. Use that timing to your advantage because even if it’s another pic of boobies, it’s a great way to start the day. Also, opening a Snapchat nude while driving is A HORRIBLE IDEA. 

5. Get a Little Weird. Not like clown weird, but throw in some articles of clothing and props for fun: socks, coats, sombreros, scarves, glasses, ties, books, animals, whatever—be creative. 

6. It is Not Better to Give Than Receive. These should be equal transactions. Not getting any goods in return is pretty much playing with yourself. Submit requests to the person your sending nudes and do the same in return. It’s nudie pic etiquette. 

7. (For  Those Enduring Long Distance Relationships) Make Time. Set a date and time to sext, Skype and do whatever you need to do to rekindle that fire from whatever unbearable amount of miles away.

Anonymous asked:

I met this guy a month ago, and we click on almost every level, and its pretty obvious he likes me...but I'm not sure I can picture myself doing the do with him. Do you think its possible to mesh so perfectly with someone that it doesn't matter that you're not 100% attracted to them?

Dear Friend,

This is every guy’s reoccurring nightmare—a girl that likes him, but does not want to bone him. Despite popular belief, and my mentality from high school and the majority of college, it’s not always about sex. It’s okay to sleep in the same bed with someone and not end up taking your clothes off, no matter how unnatural it feels. To just sit with someone, talk about things that don’t matter and not expect to get physical is called a good friendship. Don’t ruin it by forcing yourself to see this person sexually if you don’t have those feelings. Enjoy what you have and don’t worry about what you feel is expected of you. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.  

Anonymous asked:

Emma Watson, Emma Roberts, Emma Stone. Marry one, kill one, fuck one, and why? Go

I’d fuck Emma Roberts because HELLO? HAVE YOU BEEN WATCHING AMERICAN HORROR STORY COVEN?? I’d marry Emma Stone because she’d probably make me the happiest girl everyday forever and we’d be the cutest lezzie couple. And, unfortunately, I’d kill Emma Watson because I don’t need someone to tell me how to pronounce words like levi-OH-sa all damn day.